Quiet is Violent
Thank you all for your kind words and support after last month’s blog post. Because of it, I’ve had some great conversations with amazing people who reached out. I truly appreciate everyone who took the time to connect.
A friend once asked if I ever sit in silence. After living together in college, he noticed I filled every quiet moment with noise. He was right—I constantly played music, kept YouTube on, needed a podcast to fall asleep, listened to music on walks to class, refused to drive in silence, and even risked being late if my 2016 4Runner’s Bluetooth failed. Why do I hate silence? Am I alone in this?
Attempting to spend a day in silence, I realized that silence brings out my deepest fears: isolation and being alone. Even when surrounded by others, my mind dwells on these thoughts, which noise usually masks. I now see that many people—especially in Gen Z—struggle similarly, using distractions to avoid loneliness*. My goal is to share strategies that help me face these moments, so you know you’re not alone.
Verbal Affirmation: I used to joke about people who talked to themselves out loud. I wondered why anyone would say their thoughts out loud or how it could help.* But studies show that saying positive things about yourself out loud can make you notice and challenge negative self-talk. When I was quiet, those negative thoughts would come up. So I started saying affirmations out loud, and it actually helped me handle silence better. It might seem strange, but this practice helped me fight the negative thoughts that made me dislike silence.
Calling a friend or family member: When my fears start to get to me, I’ll send a text or make a call. My friend Brian, who lives in Guatemala, is like a brother to me and always reminds me that I’m loved and cared for. After talking to him, I feel relieved and reassured that those negative thoughts aren’t true and that the people who know me best really do care.
Prayer: I often use prayer to fill the silence. My relationship with God has been a steady support during my mental health journey, especially since Michael’s passing (see last post). Prayer helps me focus on what I’m grateful for and eases my worries about what I don’t have. When I share my fears with God, I feel a sense of calm. If you relate to my experience, I encourage you to spend some quiet time in prayer for guidance and peace.
Suffering in silence is a challenge I am committed to addressing—both for myself and through this brand. If you have suggestions or experiences, please share. Together, we can support each other and show that no one has to face these feelings alone.
Love
Joshua Woodall
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